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Rules for Snowpocalypse

I’ve spent the last week trapped in DC by a series of snowstorms. Two of my busses have been canceled, but I’m holding out hope that I’ll be able to catch the 10 PM Northeast Regional back to New York tonight.  Spending six days foraging for food and drinking a healthy quantity of PBR helped inspire the following rules for snowpocalypse.

1: Umbrellas are for the rain. They’ll do you no good in the snow and just serve to hit other pedestrians in the face.

2: If the street is covered with snow, it is OK to walk on it.

3: If you’re in a car, you’re waiting. The pedestrians in your way have wet feet and are cold, you at least have heat.

4: When there is little more than a one-person path through the snow, it is the responsibility of the person with more robust footwear to giveaway to those coming from the other direction.

5: Snowpants are for skiing, not the bar. Just because there is some white stuff on the ground doesn’t mean you get to dress like a fool.

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  1. Heesa Phadie says:

    Oh my word! I’m in the same boat as you…crazy crazy crazy. I think the worst part about it all is how much everyone else freaks out and cease to operate as rational human beings. Did you get back all in one cozy piece?

  2. nowooski says:

    We’ll see, my train leaves at 10 PM. What about you?

  3. […] since people are going to start acting like fools I thought it would be a good time to retread the rules for how to behave in a snowstorm that I offered to the burghers of Washington D.C. a few weeks ago. 1: Umbrellas are for the rain. […]

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